You may notice no matter how much you try optimizing your dating site profile…


Photoshopping your pictures, having a shot with a dog, showing and not telling, writing captivating stories in your bios, portraying yourself as an alpha male…


Or how good your icebreaker messages are…


It seems almost impossible to get quality matches or quality replies.


If you’re doing everything the dating experts tell you to do, but you're still getting:

• Few or no matches
  
  
• Low-quality matches
  
  
• Few or no replies
  
  
• Replies from low-quality women
  
  
• Too many replies with the dreaded "LOL," “hahaha," or “Huh?”
  
  
  

It’s Because Of One Common Dating Site Profile Issue That Can Cause You To Waste Hours, Days, And Weeks Of Your Life…

Swiping with little to no matches and reaching out with little to no responses…


Leading you to spend even more time reading blogpost after blogpost…


Watching YouTube video after YouTube video…


Buying course after course…


Overwhelming yourself and completely draining your life force…


And simultaneously losing a lot of money to dating sites and PUA gurus…


While completely destroying your self-esteem in the process…


Even if you have a face like Brad Pitt and the body of a Greek god.

That One Dating Site Profile Issue Is Called “Extrovert Imposter Profile.

Which is when you present yourself as an extrovert when in fact, you're an introvert.


Now before you click the back button cause you think you’re NOT an introvert.


First, read the checklist below.


Cause for decades in my life, I thought I was an extrovert, while in reality, I'm an introvert.


In fact, many men who are ABSOLUTELY CONVINCED AND CERTAIN they are extroverts...are actually introverts.


You see…


Introversion has nothing to do with being shy.


Cause…


There are shy introverts, and there are confident introverts.


Just like there are shy extroverts and confident extroverts.


It also has nothing to do with being social or anti-social.


Cause…


There are social introverts and non-social introverts.


Just like there are social extroverts and non-social extroverts.


According to the world authority on introversion, Susan Cain…


Introversion has everything to do with “WHERE” you get your energy from.


You see…


You might be someone who likes people and socializing…


But if you need time on your own to recharge…


It means you’re more on the introverted side of the spectrum.


Cause introverts recharge themselves by being on their own.


So…


As I said…

There’s A Good Chance You’re An Introvert While Being Absolutely Convinced You’re An Extrovert – Here’s How You Find Out.

It’s a simple checklist that will help you determine if you’re an introvert:

• You prefer deeper conversations over superficial small talk
  
  
• You choose two or three good friends over a large social circle
  
  
• You prefer diner or a night out with two or three people over huge chaotic parties packed with thousands
  
  
• You like time on your own to recharge yourself
  
  
• You think before you speak
  
  
• You're naturally a good listener, and you listen more than you speak
  
  
• You don’t like talking about yourself (especially not about your feelings)
  
  
• You are good at introspecting
  
  
  

If you recognize yourself in JUST ONE of the above bullets, you’re most likely an introvert.


And here’s the big dating site profile problem you almost automatically get when you’re an introvert.


It’s not that being an introvert is the problem.


It’s that…

99% Of Advice On Optimizing Dating Site Profiles Is Focused On Extroverts Or Turning Introverts Into Extroverts…

Here’s some typical advice you’ll find online about how to optimize your dating site profile:


Present yourself as an alpha male, show your social side, demonstrate you have lots of friends, mix in some party pictures, etc.


The problem is that you can usually see by someone’s facial expressions if it’s an introvert or an extrovert (more on that below in Dating Site Profile Secret # 1).


And when you present yourself as an extrovert while you're, in fact, an introvert…


You look incongruent.


And women have a sixth sense for detecting this particular type of incongruence.


They can sniff it in your online profile like a K9 can sniff coke in a samsonite!


And if they even get a whiff of it, you’re busted!

Fortunately, There Is Now A Way To Altogether Avoid The “Extrovert Imposter Profile” In Your Dating Site Profile.

It’s based on more than 35 years of research into introversion and dating.


And although I’ll give you some quick tips in this blogpost…


I cover this in much greater detail in my Online Dating coaching program for introverted men.


If you’d like to know more about it…


Shoot me message at nickneeson@introvertedbadass.com with “Online Dating” in the subject line…


Tell me a little about your situation and what you'd like to work on together...


And I'll get you all the details!


Alright…


Here are the three most crucial dating site profile secrets…


That will get you more matches, replies, and dates with beautiful, high-quality women than you’ll know what to do with…

DOWNLOAD THE PDF VERSION OF THIS ARTICLE NOW

SO YOU CAN USE IT FOR FUTURE REFERENCES.

Dating Site Profile Secret 1: It’s The “Congruent Pictures," Stupid!

Most dating site profile advice will tell you pictures are the most critical part.


And they’re right.


Pictures are the most essential part.


But there’s more to it (I’ll tell you in a minute).


First…


Why are pictures the most important part of your dating site profile?


No…It’s not because one picture is the equivalent of a thousand words.


It’s because pictures are harder to fake than bio descriptions.


It’s one thing to write that you’re adventurous.


It’s another thing to have a picture of you skydiving.


The last one proves you’re adventurous.


And in a world full of fakes, women are looking for proof.


So yes….

The first and biggest secret to a great dating site profile is to spend 80% of your time optimizing your pictures.

And if we agree on that, then the logical next question becomes: how do you actually optimize your photos?


Yes, things like learning how to pose or (delicately) photoshopping your shots will help…


But there's something much more critical…


Especially if you’re not blessed in the looks department.


And it’s this.

The story that your pictures tell is more important than you're looks – by far!

Evolutionary psychologists have discovered that women are more attracted to a man’s inner qualities than his looks.


Therefore it makes sense pictures that show a man's inner qualities trigger more attraction than pictures just showing a pretty face in a headshot.


And that’s where the “Extrovert Imposter Profile” problem starts.


Cause every dating coach worth his salt knows you have to show these attractive qualities in your pictures…

The problem is most dating profile tips on how to tell an engaging story in your photos… tell you to show extroverted qualities instead of introverted qualities!

For example…


They’ll tell you to show you like to party, have lots of friends, are a gregarious alpha male, etc.


Cause their assumption is that women want an outgoing social showboat.


Which is totally wrong!


Women who like extroverts want this.


Not the ones who like introverts.

And the consequences of “Extrovert Imposter Profile” are much more significant than you might think…

Cause not only will you repulse women who are compatible with you (aka women who like introverts)…


But you will also repulse women who like extroverts…


Yes, you read that right.


You’ll repulse both types!


Why?


Cause the ones that like introverts are just not going to be drawn to the extroverted lifestyle…


And the ones that like extroverts will get an intuitive feeling that you’re not who you pretend to be!


Cause as I said…

You can see on someone’s facial expressions if that person is an introvert…

People's faces get shaped by their emotions and character traits.


You can clearly see this in older people.


Sometimes you see old people, and they have sad wrinkles on their faces…


And sometimes you see old people who have happy wrinkles on their face…

That’s because our dominant emotions and character traits (the ones we use and feel the most in our life) CLEARLY show in our faces…

Especially when we get older…


And even though it's not as apparent on someone in his forties then on someone in his nineties…


You can see subtle signs of this at ANY age…


Here’s how that relates to introversion.


Introverts are naturally introspective…


They think more…


They think deeper…

A lot of deep thinking shapes the appearance of your face…

Look at the picture below…



You can see this guy is an introvert…


You can literally see it on his face…


If this guy presents himself as an extrovert…


It won’t work!


And while most women will never know precisely WHY your profile “feels” incongruent to them…


They will unconsciously get a sense you’re fake…


And disqualify you…


Without even giving you the chance to show them the real you!


Cause…

They see a guy pretending to be that loud, gregarious, alpha male. Still, his face looks like a sensitive, thoughtful guy who profoundly thinks about stuff.

See what I mean?


It all happens when the face is NOT congruent with the story of the picture.


Which brings me to the real point.


It’s not “pictures” that are the key to your success.


It’s “congruent” pictures.


If you would like to see examples of picture stories that work and don’t work for introverts…


As well as discover my A to Z system for online dating success as an introverted man…


Shoot me message at nickneeson@introvertedbadass.com


with “Online Dating” in the subject line…


Tell me a little about your situation and what you'd like to work on together...


And I'll get you all the details!

Dating Site Profile Secret #2: From Adjective Overload to Story Telling in Your Bio (But Not The Way You’ve Been Told To In The Other Articles You’ve Read).

Now that we know about the importance of pictures, let's talk about the second most crucial part of your dating site profile.


Which is your actual BIO description.


Your bio description should be congruent with your pictures.


You see…


If you only have selfies of you in your kitchen…


Don’t expect writing about that time you climbed Mount Everest barefoot, with one hand, carrying a 30-pound backpack, is going to make a difference.

Just like your pictures need to be congruent with who you are, your bio should be congruent with your photos too!

But aside from that obvious rule…


What else is essential?


Well, most introverted guys make the mistake of using what I call Adjective Overload.


Meaning they make a list of all the adjectives describing them.


Adventurous. Reliable. Humoristic, yada yada yada.


The reasons why this doesn’t work is because

1. It’s boring (every other guy on the planet is doing it).
   
   
2. It looks like you are bragging.
   
   
3. There's no proof in there.
   
   
   

So how can you sell yourself without being boring…

Without bragging…


And while proving you're actually the Indiana Jones, you pretend to be?


Well… just like your pictures need to tell a story…


Your profile needs to do the same!


Stories are much more believable than a list of adjectives…


Cause people have used stories since the beginning of times…


Our brains are literally wired for stories.


Plus, stories bring excitement to your profile…

Did you know that when people listen to or read a story, the same part of the brain gets activated when they take Cocaine?

So if you want your profile to stick out by providing proof and excitement…


Write stories in your bio!


Needless to say, the story you tell in your bio needs to follow the same rules as the story your pictures tell…


Meaning…

If you're an introvert, don't tell stories that make you look like an extrovert…

Cause they will only trigger the “Extrovert Imposter Profile” sixth sense, women have!


Btw, your stories don't have to be Ernest Hemingway novels.


They just need to showcase your qualities.


They can be very short.

Here’s an example of an introvert-friendly bio description that works really well.

"I ran with the buffalos in Africa. I consult for clients on money matters. Plus, I ate a tarantula once in Cambodia because I'll try anything once… but please don't ask me to try it again.


Think you can handle me? Shoot me a text, and let's swap travel tales."


As you can see, a good profile doesn't need to belong.


It's a short story that pictures the guy as:

• Adventurous: running with buffalo's in Afrika and eating a Tarantula
  
  
• Likes to travel to faraway places: Afrika.
  
  
• Someone with a higher status job: consulting for clients on money matters
  
  
• Funny: I'll try anything once… but please don't ask me to try it again.
  
  
  

Nowhere does it imply he's an alpha male with a sick social circle who likes to party like crazy!


Which brings me to…

Dating Site Profile Secret #3: Don’t Present Yourself as an Alpha Male

If you’ve been reading this article all the way till here…


You know that…


The biggest and most common mistake introverts make in their dating site profile is creating the infamous "Extrovert Imposter Profile."


And the pinnacle of the Extrovert Imposter Profile is…


Presenting yourself as an Alpha Male when, in fact, you're an introvert.


“But, Nick, I want to be an alpha male cause women are attracted to alpha males!”


And…


“Nick… even though I might not be one yet, I can still work on becoming one!”

No, you can't! (Don't worry, there's something better… tell you in sec.)

But for now…


Just understand that…


If you're an introvert, it’s insane to think you can become a copy of Donald Trump.


Plus, it's utterly useless and counterproductive!


Mainly because (as I just said) there’s something much better.

Did you know there’s another type of man JUST AS attractive to women as the alpha male?

Notice I DID’NT say… “almost” as attractive as the alpha male… or “quite“ attractive…


I said JUST AS ATTRACTIVE!


In fact, to probably half of the women on this planet, he's MORE attractive than the alpha male.


You see, an alpha male is, per definition, an extrovert.


He feeds on the energy of people…


Did you see Trump and his rallies?


Remember his last campaign against Biden?


At one point, he was doing 4 or 5 rallies PER DAY!


And he NEVER looked drained or tired… AT 74 YEARS OF AGE!


That’s cause Trump is an extrovert.


And extroverts feed on the energy of big crowds.


The more they are tired, the more they seek out people to recharge.


And you can’t change that.


You either need people to recharge yourself, or you need time on your own.


If you need time on your own, you can’t be an alpha male.


But as I said, there's another type of male out there!


Just as attractive as the alpha male!

It's the Sigma Male (we simply call him the Introverted Badass).

The Introverted Badass has a lot of alpha male qualities.


But he’s more of the lonely ranger… the silent, strong one.


He doesn’t care about the opinions of others.


He doesn’t care about the hierarchical rules that the alpha cares about.


In fact, he lives outside of the hierarchy.


Think Neo vs. Morpheus in the Matrix.


Morpheus is an Alpha Male.


But Neo is an Introverted Badass.


He doesn’t obey Morpheus.


He doesn’t see Morpheus as his boss.


Nope…


Neo does whatever the heck he wants to do.


Plus, he's the one who gets the girl!

The example of the profile description in Dating Site Profile Secret #2 was an example of an Introverted Badass.

Here it is again for your convenience.


"I ran with the buffalos in Africa. I consult for clients on money matters. Plus, I ate a tarantula once in Cambodia because I'll try anything once… but please don't ask me to try it again.


Think you can handle me? Shoot me a text, and let's swap travel tales."


Notice how it’s NOT painting the picture of a guy who has a sick social circle or throws house parties for hundreds of people.


It doesn’t position him as the alpha male.


But it does position him as the Introverted Badass!


Which is the only thing you need to do in your dating site profile to increase your success rate as an introvert!


That said…


I understand that…


Reading an article can’t possibly give you enough examples to really help you out with your dating site profile…


Best case, it can only point you in the right direction…


If you’d like to get deeper in this…


Shoot me message at nickneeson@introvertedbadass.com


with “Online Dating” in the subject line…


Tell me a little about your situation and what you'd like to work on together...


And I'll get you all the details!

Frequently Asked Questions About Dating Site Profiles

What’s “Extrovert Imposter Profile” Again?

Extrovert Imposter Profile is when an introvert presents himself as an extrovert.


Your micro facial expressions will show you're an introvert, while your dating site profile portrays you as an extrovert.


No matter how much you try to look like an extrovert, pics with lots of friends, partying, socializing, being alpha…


It's IMPOSSIBLE to hide facial expressions that have shaped your facial structure since childhood.


And even though women don’t consciously know WHY…


They will unconsciously sense something about you is fake and disqualify you.

How can you avoid Extrovert Imposter Syndrome?

It’s simple.


You just need to learn how to present yourself as an attractive introvert.


Aka the Sigma Male, more commonly known as...The Introverted Badass.


The Introverted Badass is the equivalent of the alpha male, but instead of craving attention and feeding on the energy of substantial social circles…


The Introverted Badass is more the lonely ranger type.


I hope you liked this email...


Cause it's all I've got for ya today!


Nick


PS: I'm starting a new "Online Dating” coaching program for introverted men.


We start by helping you build your profile (pictures and bio)...


Show you how to start conversations on different sites and apps…


How to have free-flowing conversations after the ice breaker (using our Controlling Contingencies™ method)...


How to set up virtual dates as well as in-person dates…


And we show you how to minimize flakes, too.


If you're more on the introverted side of the spectrum...you may be surprised to see what can happen :)


I have an amazing collection of "date getting formulas" for different dating sites and apps...


And I'd love to work with you.


Just send me a email at nickneeson@introvertedbadass.com


... with "Online Dating" in the subject line...


Tell me a little about your situation and what you'd like to work on together...


And I'll get you all the details!

DOWNLOAD THE PDF VERSION OF THIS ARTICLE NOW

SO YOU CAN USE IT FOR FUTURE REFERENCES.