If want to discover how to find a girlfriend online and you’re more on the introverted side of the spectrum… read this article.


You see...


Getting a girlfriend can be a challenge for introverts.


Mainly because most dating advice is geared towards extroverts…


Or tries to turn introverts into extroverts.


(Related: Did you know there’s one deadly mistake that almost all men make when they want to make a woman their girlfriend…


And it’s such a lethal one…


That even if a woman was crazy attracted and even “in love” with you…


If you make this one mistake…


She’ll do a 180 on you and NEVER become your girlfriend.


And the sad part is that 99% of men make this mistake over and over…


Leading them to stay lonely for the better part of their lives!


Wanna know what it is?


Shoot me an email at nickneeson@introvertedbadass.com


with subject line “The 180 Mistake” and I’ll tell you what it is!)


Therefore…


Many introverted men turn to online dating as a solution.


But even most advice on how to find a girlfriend online…


Tries to turn you into someone you're not.


You know the deal…


They say stuff like…

• Bro, you need to be more alpha in your pics!
  
  
  
• No, dude! You need to show you have a sick social circle!
  
  
  
• Wrong, man! You need to show shirtless pictures of you raving in some high-end club!
  
  
  

The common factor?


If you’re an introverted man…


That’s not who you are.


And when you’re looking to find a girlfriend online…


Presenting yourself as someone you’re not is the worst thing you can do.


Cause you give yourself a false sense of progression.


You see…


You might get a few women messaging you.


Maybe (doubtfully) even a date.


But sooner or later, the façade will crumble.


And she’ll see you as an imposter.


Which means you’re back at square one!


So…


If you’re more on the introverted side of the spectrum…


Here’s my secret 10-step formula to find a girlfriend online!

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Secret 1 – How To Find A Girlfriend Online By Going Where The Girlfriend Material Is

When I was younger, I liked fishing for carp!


One day, my friend suggested we go fish for trout.


Guess what we discussed first?


Nope, we didn’t discuss which bait we would use…


Or what type of fishing rod…


Or anything like that.


No, no, no!


The first thing we discussed was “where” we would go fishing for trout.


We found out there was a pond not far from where we lived…


That was filled with trout!


In fact…


This pond was so chockfull of trout that even if we would use an empty fishhook…


We’d probably catch one!


So, of course, that's where we went.


Which brings me to my point…


If you want to find a girlfriend online…


The very first step is to go on dating sites where the right kind of women hang out.


Meaning women that are girlfriend material.


You see…


Basically, there are two types of women.


Girlfriend material and non-girlfriend material.


Non-girlfriend material is the promiscuous type.


The type that likes to sleep around!


And although they can be exciting to date when you’re looking for casual flings…


You don’t want them as a girlfriend!


Cause you’ll be in for a rough ride.


Now, on the other hand…


Women that are girlfriend material are the exact opposite.


These are women that are looking for a boyfriend.


They are not looking to fool around.


They are the loyal type.


And that’s the type you want as a girlfriend.


So…


Assuming you want to maximize your chances of finding girlfriend material…


Doesn’t it make sense to go on dating sites where these types conglomerate?


Just like if you want to catch trout, you go to a pond filled with trout, right?


Well, it’s the same her.


So if we accept that to be true…


The next question becomes…


What are the best dating sites and apps to find girlfriend material?


Well…


Here are some of them:

• Hinge
  
  
  
• Match
  
  
  
• The League
  
  
  
• Bumble
  
  
  
• Coffee Meets Bagel
  
  
  

So your best place to start is picking one of these sites.


Once you’ve done that…


It’s time for…

Secret 2 – How To Find A Girlfriend Online By Presenting Yourself A Boyfriend Material

After my friend and I decided to go to that trout pond, the next question we asked ourselves was…


What type of bait do we use?


As I told you…


We were used to fishing for carps, and carps eat different things than trout.


If I were to use bait that carps like, we would catch little trout.


Again, it’s the same with women and dating.


If you’re looking for a woman that is girlfriend material, you better present yourself as boyfriend material.


Cause if you present yourself as a player, you’ll attract the promiscuous types.


And since you’re reading this article on how to find a girlfriend online…


I’m assuming you don’t want to attract the promiscuous types.


So…


How do you present yourself as boyfriend material?


Well, that brings us to the next secret…

Secret 3 – How To Find A Girlfriend Online By Balancing Excitement With Stability In Your Pictures And Bio Description

Women want two things in a long-term boyfriend.


Excitement and stability.


If your pictures and your bio description describe you as “only” exciting…


You'll attract promiscuous women.


Or if you attract a woman, that's girlfriend material…


She might have a short romance with you…


But eventually, she'll leave you!


Cause guys that only give her excitement without stability… ain’t good long-term partners.


How can she think of building a future with someone who does not offer her stability?


On the other hand…


If you only present yourself as the stable, responsible guy…


But you’re NOT exciting…


You’ll land in the friendzone!


So it’s crucial to present yourself as both exciting and stable.


The way to do that is pretty simple.


Mix up your pictures.


Some showing your exciting side.


And showing your stable side.


For example...


You could have one picture of you rock climbing and another one of you with a dog.


Rock-climbing is excitement; having a dog is a sign of responsibility and stability.


Now, what if you don't have a dog?


Or what if you don’t do rock-climbing?


Don’t worry…


There are more than 100 different mental triggers that you can use to trigger excitement and stability.


And for each of those 100 mental triggers, there are endless ways of showing that in your pictures.


Which means…


No matter your situation…


No matter your personality…


You’ll ALWAYS be able to present both excitement and stability.


And without posing as someone, you're not!


If you would like to take a deeper dive into this… I have a course on online dating specifically for introverted men.


It shows precisely how this works.


If you want to know more about it, shoot me a message at nickneeson@introvertedbadass.com with “Online Dating” in the subject line, and I’ll get you all the details.


By the way…


The same principle of balancing excitement and stability also applies to your bio description.


If one paragraph talks about the time you bungee jumped, the next one about the time you skydived, and the one after that about the time you climbed Mount Everest…


She’ll see you as a thrill seeker!


But…


If you only talk about how you take care of your family, dog, and friends…


She’ll see you as a caring yet boring person.


Which also doesn’t work!


On the other hand…


If one paragraph talks about you racing a car.


The next one about your exquisite wine tasting events.


And yet another one about how you read bedtime stories to your little niece.


Suddenly you’re balancing excitement and stability!


See what I mean?


Again…


If you want a deeper dive and see real-life bios that embody this balancing principle…


I have an Online Dating course specifically for introverted men.


If you want to know more about it, shoot me a message at nickneeson@introvertedbadass.com with “Online Dating” in the subject line, and I’ll get you all the details.


Also…


Besides balancing excitement and stability…


There’s another crucial thing you need to do if you want to find a girlfriend online.


And that’s...

Secret 4 – How To Find A Girlfriend Online By NEVER, EVER Presenting Yourself As An Extrovert If You’re An Introvert – E V E R! (This Is CRU-CI-AL!)

If you present yourself as an extrovert, you’ll attract women that fall for extroverts.


Guess what happens when they later find out you’re an introvert?


Yeah, they dump ya!


Now…


If you’re looking for a one-time fling…


You MIGHT…VERY MAYBE… IF YOU HAVE A LOT OF LUCK… be able to get away with it.


Cause you might be able to hide it just long enough to sleep with her.


But if you’re looking for a long-term girlfriend…


It won’t work.


Cause she’ll quickly find out.


In fact…


Even if you're just looking for a fling, most of the time, this still won't work.


Cause women have a sixth sense for this.


Here’s what to do instead:


Realize there’s nothing wrong with being an introvert.


Extroverts are not better than introverts, or vice versa.


If you’re an introvert…


You just need to present yourself as an attractive introvert – not as an extrovert!


And when you know how to do that…


You'll attract women that like introverts.


Which is precisely what you want.


Again…


If you want a deeper dive into how to present yourself as an attractive introvert (aka an Introverted Badass)…


I have an Online Dating course, specifically for introverted men.


It shows you exactly how to do it.


If you want to know more about it, shoot me a message at nickneeson@introvertedbadass.com with “Online Dating” in the subject line, and I’ll get you all the details.


Next up…

Secret 5 – How To Find A Girlfriend Online By Checking Early For Red Flags

As I said earlier…


If you’re looking for a girlfriend...


You want girlfriend material, not promiscuous material!


And you should screen early on for red flags.


Here are a few you can see just from her profile

• Does she have tattoos?
  
  
  
• Does she smoke?
  
  
  
• Does she dye her hair in an unnatural color such as pink or blue?
  
  
  

All these are signs of being comfortable breaking the rules.


And you don’t want a woman that’s comfortable breaking the rules.


Cause there's a big chance, she'll also break the loyalty rule that is crucial in a long-term relationship.


Obviously…


There are many more red flags.


But that would go beyond the scope of this article.


Cause it’s already getting pretty long.


And I still want to cover other stuff!


But you get the point, right?


Okay.


Good.


So the next thing is…

Secret 6 – How To Find A Girlfriend Online By Behaving like Mr. Right…Not Like Mr. Right Now

Now that you checked for red flags…


It’s time to start messaging her.


And there are basically two messaging strategies.


One is to message like Mr. Right.


Another is to message like Mr. Right Now!


Messaging like Mr. Right Now is what players do.


There’s a lot of attraction and sexual innuendo in this type of messaging.


The only thing it does is create attraction and arousal.


So, obviously…


If you use that strategy, you're going to attract the slutty women!


On the other hand…


If you message like Mr. Right, you’ll create attraction too…


But you’ll ALSO “bond” with her!


Btw, don’t make the mistake of only creating a bond.


Cause then you won’t be Mr. Right, nor Mr. Right Now… but Mr. Friend!


So, to position yourself as Mr. Right…


Your messaging strategy needs to create attraction ASWELL as a connection.


You need BOTH to attract girlfriend material.


Examples of things you can do to create attraction are teasing her, role-playing, challenging her, disagreeing, etc.


Examples of things you can do to create a connection are asking her more profound questions, finding out about her personality, motivations, and emotions.


Warning!


Don't look for commonalities, as this comes across as insincere!


Next up…

Secret 7 – How To Find A Girlfriend Online By Not Telling Her You’re Looking For A Girlfriend

Most introverts make the mistake of telling women they are looking for a girlfriend.


They usually do this when they know a woman is looking for something serious.


Their reasoning is...


"Well… if a woman is looking for a serious relationship, I'd better tell I'm looking for one too!”


Makes sense, right?


Well… on the surface, it does…


But if you dig deeper, you'll see it doesn't.


You see…


Yes… quality women want a man that can commit to them.


But they don't want a man that gives up his freedom too quickly.


Cause a man that is proactively looking to give up his freedom…


It is most likely a man that is not enjoying it!


And which men don’t enjoy their freedom?


Mostly men who don’t have success with women.


And a man that’s not successful with the galls is unattractive to women.


You see…


Studies have shown that women are attracted to men when they know other women are attracted to them.


It's called "Pre-selection."


So when a woman knows you are preselected by other women…


It triggers insane amounts of attraction in her.


In fact, pre-selection is one of the most potent attraction switches within women.


And if you say you’re looking for a girlfriend…


You signal to them you're not preselected.


And even that you’re desperate.


Plus…


Women also want to be THE ONE that changed your mind.


They like being able to say to their friends…


“Yeah, he was having a good time as a bachelor… but then he met “Me," and he changed!”


So, if a woman ever asks you what your intentions are…


Don’t tell her you’re looking for a girlfriend.


Instead, tell her you're open to the idea of getting into a relationship, but you're not in a hurry.


That’s a much better thing to do.


Alright…


Up to the next step…

Secret 8 – How To Find A Girlfriend Online By Qualifying Her During Your Dates

Qualifying her simply means…


You want to find out if she has the qualities, you are looking for in a girlfriend.


It’s important to check this during your dates for multiple reasons.


First of all…


If you want a long-term girlfriend…


Well…


Isn’t it logical that you want one that matches your likes?


Of course, it is!


Second…


By qualifying her, she’ll feel that you have standards.


And a man that has standards...


It is usually a man that has options with women!


Again… you’re triggering the pre-selection switch.


For example…


I like women that can cook well.


So, when I was on a date, I always brought up the topic of cooking…


And asked if she considered herself a good cook!


It’s that simple!


But devastatingly effective in creating attraction as well as making sure she’s a good fit for you!


Okay.


So… once a woman meets your criteria, it’s time for…

Secret 9 – How To Find A Girlfriend Online By Escalating To Sex

The next thing you want to do is escalate the relationship towards physical intimacy.


Cause you can’t make a woman your girlfriend without sleeping with her.


Sleeping with her comes first.


Now…


Of course, you’re not going to do that on the first date.


Not with a quality woman.


But throughout your dates, you want to get to that act!


And the best way to do that…


Is to start by touching her in socially acceptable places (shaking hands, touching her arm, etc.)…


Then as the chemistry between both of you grows…


Start touching her in more seductive places (holding hands, kissing, etc.).


And finally…


When she’s comfortable with that…


Start touching her in sexual places (breasts, and so on.)!


Now…


Once you’ve had sex with a woman, it’s time for…

Secret 10 – How To Find A Girlfriend Online By Going From Casual To Committed

This step is very simple, so I’ll keep it short.


To become a couple…


The only thing you need to do…


Is do more stuff that couples do!


For example…


Going hiking together, spending a Sunday together, meeting each other’s friends, etc.


That’s really all there’s to it!

Conclusion On How To Find A Girlfriend Online

Finding a girlfriend online isn’t hard.


In fact, it’s pretty simple.


You just need to follow the 10 steps I outlined in this blog post, and you'll be good!


But…


BE CAREFUL!


Even if you apply all the steps from this blog post…


There’s one deadly mistake that almost all men make when they want to turn a woman into their girlfriend…


And it’s such a lethal one…


That even if a woman is crazy attracted to you…


Heck, even if she’s “in love” with you…


If you make this one mistake…


She’ll do a 180 and NEVER become your girlfriend.


And the sad part is that 99% of introverted men make this mistake over and over…


Leading them to stay lonely for the better part of their lives!


Luckily there’s a simple solution.


Wanna know what it is?


Shoot me an email at nickneeson@introvertedbadass.com with subject line “The 180 Mistake” and I’ll tell you what it is!)


Okay.


Gotta go work.


Have a great day.


Nick

DOWNLOAD THE PDF VERSION OF THIS ARTICLE

SO YOU CAN USE IT FOR FUTURE REFERENCES